It can be an incredibly difficult thing to see someone we love be affected by trauma. It hurts to see a person like a daughter, someone we care so much about, to experience so much pain. You want to help your daughter, but you don’t know how. Sometimes you make mistakes that just seem to make things worse. In times like these to remember that there are two things that can best help your daughter:
When you see a loved in so much pain, we just want them to be better now. We want to just be able to take away all of their pain right now. Unfortunately, this just isn’t how healing happens. Above all else you need to be patient with their healing and that can be an incredibly frustrating process. There will be times that you think that a certain path is what’s best for them and you’ll want to force them down this path. Instead though, you need to be there with her. You need to allow her to experience her emotions in her own time and to be with her every step of the way, no matter how difficult that is. And that process takes a lot of patience.
Validation and support are to key to your daughter’s successful treatment. Sometimes when someone is struggling to overcome a traumatic event, it can be hard to really understand why they are feeling the way that they are. You may want to say things to them like “It happened years ago”, “It’s not a big deal”, or “You just need to get over it”. But to them, it is a big deal. It’s a huge deal. That traumatic experience and the pain associated with it have come to define their life. Because of this it is so vitally important to let them know that “Hey what you’re going through is hard and I’m so sorry that this has happened to you. But always remember that I’m here for you, no matter what and that I love you and I believe in you”. It doesn’t have to those exact words, but the idea behind it is so vital. This isn’t just validating for them, but it’s letting them know that you’re there with them and that you believe in them. You believe that they have what it takes to get through this struggle. This helps them realize that they can heal and that they can get through this. It helps them find the hope and strength that they might not have had before.
If you feel that your daughter is struggling through traumatic past experience and needs help please call us at 866-754-4807. We can guide you daughter and your family down the road to recovery.